So coming out of a 72 hour Christian “retreat”
experience called Trinity Great Banquet, I am all jazzed up, high on faith, and
riding the wave of ambition and change. Mob-mentality moved me to action, got
me outside my comfort zone, and forced me to look with a critical eye at my own
faith life.
I could talk about this experience for days
and write a novel about the experience, but at the moment I have stepped out of
that haven of cultivated Christian fellowship and study and back into my real
world life, and there are- of course- forces pulling from all directions and
lots of work to get caught up on…but a small piece of the story is asking to be
shared, and a bit of accountability is in order: thus Dawn Devotions had to be
hammered out raw and right now. And then sleep.
At the end of the weekend experience, I was
asked what I was going to do with what I learned…one of the biggest things laid
on my heart this weekend is the uncomfortable fact that my prayer life is…lacking,
at best.
I pray all the time. I pray with my kids. I
pray for myself, my family, my friends, and people in need. I have a stack of
devotionals that I read when I have time- I’m a busy working mom, and I get it
in where I can fit it in. Sure, there are some days I skip out when I have
deadlines to meet, and I usually flip past the additional scripture references,
and sometimes I only get a page into my chapter before I drift off in bed at
night, but hey- I have a lot on my plate, I already hardly sleep, and I’m doing
the best I can, and that’s all I can do, right?
Right?
Priorities. They’re a tricky thing, yes?
Tricky how I trick myself into complacency with the “have to” things and the “need
to” tasks and the “when I have the time, I will....”
Intentionality and accountability. That’s
all it is, friends.
And so, I find myself fighting the
overwhelming temptation to turn off that alarm at 6:01 this morning. A whole
hour of sleep sounds a whole lot better than sitting at the kitchen table with
a book and bleary eyes, but I drag out. I had a bad attitude: I was a grouchy
disciple this morning. I was grumbling, hand in head, yawning and cracking the book
and telling myself that maybe I was just being too overzealous- I’d tone it
down, start small: surely 15 minutes in the Word and 45 back in the Bed would
be a good start to this new idea. I’d go to bed earlier tonight, try harder
tomorrow.
And then I glanced at the next page and saw
this random verse in Ephesians 5 jump out at me:
“Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead,
and Christ will shine on you.”
Hmm…was I just yawning? Ok, ok, I hear You…
So this is it: Dawn Devotions, Day One. I’m
listening.
